How to Do Nothing And Get Banned On Facebook in 2018

1. Do nothing, literally. Do not play their “you have two notifications” and “get at least 15 friends” games.

So as I deleted my Facebook account in July, but after a few months in September I created a new one. But this time I wanted to have a more private life on Facebook. But I got permabanned eventually.

1. I registered an account. Everything went fine. I didn’t have to enter a mobile phone number and didn’t have to have a profile photo. Everything looked picture perfect. I just wanted to follow Animefest.cz, be present in the group and have no friends.
2. I even was able to set my list of friends to show only to me in case I had some friends. Also I turned off all “Ivan Alenko likes this page” and all this personalisation and ads shit.
3. Set 2FA. I thought I get credibility in eyes of Facebook. But in the end, they still fucked me over.
4. Everything went good, but after two days I couldn’t access my profile and I had to provide my telephone number. Also I got a lot of fake “you have 2 notifications from your friends” and since I didn’t have any friends, yeah, right. When I checked my profile, nothing new was there, no notifications. Anyways, I entered a telephone number from old profile. So much for a new beginning. Instantly I got suggested all my old friends. Fuck this shit.
5. But I didn’t play along with Facebook and I didn’t befriended anybody. I wanted a new life and fuck mandatory Messenger application, that’s why.
6. After few days I had to send my government ID to them or won’t be allowed to access my profile. Well, I did. I bowed before our benevolent dictator Facebook and I befriended 4 people, so wouldn’t have got suspicious and get cleaned.
7. Things went fine for a few days, but then they wanted me to upload a picture of me or I won’t be able to access my profile. I complied. It took three days for some person to unlock my account.
8. I thought it was the end of my pain. But after a week they wanted to upload a picture of me again.
9. And again and again. My account got locked after a week or two since last unlock. What the fuck did I do wrong? I didn’t do anything. That’s wrong. But fuck it, I didn’t want to play a “social network” game. No posts on the wall, no profile photo, a few friends and no private messages.
10. But I liked Animefest.cz and Goju-Ryu karate pages and I attended some events and even added some comments. My ideal social life at that time, because I felt exhausted and wanted to live a simpler life.
11. One day, my account get perma locked and “if you think it was a mistake go to help center”. Reading between the lines it meant “get the fuck out of our platform and fast”. No reason provided about the permaban. We don’t like you and get the fuck out.
12. And I did. And I still feel harassed and abused.

I won’t bother with this social network anymore. And I’m not the only one who thinks social sites sucks - The year social networks were no longer social. They weren’t exiled from Facebook though.

<THIS IS FINE>

And I really like technologies Facebook open sources and I’ll keep using them. Their developers are really smart.

I wanted to write this for like two months now and finally I released my rage and recipe how to get banned!